


Love Himself At Depressing Times Like This

by ADAMWryter



Category: Avengers: Endgame (2019), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Depression, Depression Masturbation, Gag, Light Masochism, M/M, Male Autosexuality, Male Homosexuality, Masturbation, Threesome - M/M/M (lowkey), libido
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-01
Updated: 2019-07-01
Packaged: 2020-06-02 03:20:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19432873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ADAMWryter/pseuds/ADAMWryter
Summary: Thor's been feeling mentally unwell after their last encounter with Thanos and he sliced off his head, but he found a way to feel better, touching himself.





	Love Himself At Depressing Times Like This

**Author's Note:**

> This is very very wild to me, this is the first time I have written something like this. It's a very new and amazing experience. Chris Hemsworth as Thor is too much of a hot god to not bring to the dark corners of my fantasies.  
> It also contains a little bit of autosexuality because in my mind, I think there's no way Thor couldn't be attracted to himself with that handsomeness.
> 
> So, hope you guys would enjoy it.

Thor’s sitting in his dimmed room. It’s not absolutely dark, it’s just the lighting is not very bright. He’s been keeping his room like that ever since Thanos snapped his finger and before he sliced that purple bastard’s head. That was when there was still hope of finding that son of a bitch and reversing his doing, so a dimmed room was to not let anyone see him shedding his tears thinking he’s useless, to prepare everyone’s spirit for a fight coming anytime. But now, with all hopes gone, he’s sitting there in his dimmed room at the Avengers’ facility again, thinking he’s useless.

No one’s said a thing since their return to Earth, because no one has the strength, or the spirit to. Thor aimed for the head, yes, he did. But this time it doesn’t solve any problem. Thor has sort of destroyed their last hope when he chopped off that motherfucker’s head. But no one in the team blames him, because one they know nothing is going to change, Thanos is not going to help them bring back the lost, and two, they don’t want to sabotage the god any further, he’s already ruined inside.

And there it goes, he’s sitting in his room, feeling sorry for himself, with a little bit for the rest of humanity of course. It is absolutely psychologically normal for a person to protect himself from all the negative feelings and put himself in front of others. If Tony’s calculation was right, Thor was actually born on August 11th, in the horoscope of Leo. So, he’s marked with a little bit of narcissism, self-interest… well, less than Tony’s,… with natural royalty and leadership, of course because he’s a king, a little of possessiveness, impatience and arrogance,… and also with harsh self-criticism, self-loathing, and negative self-center to an extent. So, when everything’s gone down to ruin, he just sits there blaming himself… It’s him that should have gone for the head, true… It’s him that destroyed everyone’s last hope, well somewhat but not entirely true… It’s him that should have stopped Thanos from the beginning when that delusive maniac attacked him for the Power Stone, not true at all, he could not have done anything else… But still he feels like that, everything is his fault. Honestly, he’s not very different from Stark…

Right, Stark… Tony Stark. He seems nice… and brave, he fought Thanos, too. That should have been Thor’s job, at least that’s what he’s assuming. Stark has always been a caring teammate. But it seems like no one notices that. Now that he’s thinking about it, he and Tony share many similarities. Well, besides the loathing attitude towards themselves, they both think Steve is really hot… Now that’s shocking… Has his thinking gone too far and too fast… Well, psychologically, free association has no bound… But it seems weird Thor’s thinking about both of the men at the moment of harsh self-reflecting after all that disasters. They’re his two bestest friends ever since he came to Earth and joined the Avengers… But “friends” doesn’t mean he doesn’t think they’re immensely attractive. And that is when he feels his lower body full of sexual energy.

Oh my… He can feel his libido invading him, at times like this… And according to psychoanalysis, times like this are when he’s losing control over his cognition, and everything from the unconscious is starting to come to the surface and start vandalizing his mind. This includes his self-loathing, his shame, and even his hidden homosexual orientation. They are being called to his awareness. Thor has never let it out or been sure that he’s been having a taste for men. It’s strange but now he can hardly deny it, he surely finds Anthony and Steve handsome and charming. Therefore, in short, Thor’s self-hatred coming to the surface of his cognition brings his sexual drive along, possibly as a potential coping mechanism. But they really make his head go crazy, he doesn’t even know what he’s feeling right now, all that self-pity, self-hatred and self-sexual desire.

After a while, Thor just sighs and surrenders to his mental dynamics. He throws his head back onto the couch, and his left hand slowly runs down to his crotch. He’s aware that his cock is being erected with all the thoughts going on in his mind, and after a touch, he grabs it with all of his palm and begins gently rubbing it. It feels great, yeah, very great and he can somehow feel dopamine and oxytocin starting getting released, soothing his painful mood. For a moment, Thor thinks he’s relieved from all the blame he’s put on himself. So he just rubs it, he rubs his bulge along its length, and he likes it. His breath is becoming heavier, and quicker, a sign of desiring more.

Thor takes off his armor, to reveal a thinner layer of shirt underneath. It is unsure whether the shirt is too thin or his abdominal muscles are too strong and thick that with just a sweep of his fingers over the shirt, he can feel the pleasure on his skin being transmitted to his brain. His right hand runs on his body over the fabric, but he can feel it, very clearly, while the other is still rubbing that big bulge. He never thought of worshipping his own muscles. But to recall some memories, Tony used to compliment a lot on his muscle… If he remembers correctly, Tony said they were “delicious”. Tony’s not bad, too. His body shape isn’t bad for a man of his age, for a Midgardian, of course. Steve sometimes admires his body, too, when they hit the gym together. Steve had the serum injected inside of him but who cares, still hot. The body shapes of two men reappear in his vision, he can see almost every line on those muscles, and he likes them, he likes them very much.

Then the vision of his body comes in, it’s almost like he’s looking at a mirror in front of him. For the first time, Thor actually feels beautiful. Well, he has heard these compliments countless of time, about how divinely attractive he is. But he never feels as authentic as this moment. Probably because this acts as a defending mechanism for the negative emotions he’s dealing with. Thor feels loved, by himself, but that’s okay. He enjoys that, he enjoys his body, for the first time in forever.

Thor then sneaks his hand under his pants, gently grabs his cock and pulls it out of its hiding. He looks at his cock and admires himself, and oh my goodness, it’s in godly size. He grabs it, he can feel the heat of his palm and his every finger on it. Thor leaves out a hot breath and continues stroking it. The friction between his skin and the fabric of his pants disappears, leaving only skin to skin contact, a divine connection. He’s a god, every inch of his body is godly, godly beautiful. His right hand reaches for his nipple and begins tweezing it, making him higher in the erotic ecstasy. Then that hand just reaches for the head of his cock, and sweeps the precum liquid with the tip of his index finger. And it even gets sexier when he brings that finger close to his face. Then for a quick action, he brings his finger close to his lips, and uses his tongue to touch it. It has no taste, but it feels both weird and new. It’s almost like he’s sucking his own cock but it’s just alright.

He sighs heavily, emptying all the breath inside his stomach, and continues his stroking. It seems like it would take longer for a god to reach his climax, but not if he is stimulated by a god, himself. He can feel it coming in real close, but just not there. His other hand falls down to his chin, touches and caresses his beard. That feels great, too. Facial hair is really a thing to for a man to consider in Asgardian culture, it almost decides the beauty of him. And why, Anthony seems to always compliment on Thor’s beard, though his beard is very interesting, too. Honestly, Thor thinks no one could pull that beard off like Tony. And for his, Thor thinks he has a competitor, Steve. Thor would mock Steve for copying his beard all the time if the state of the universe wasn’t so sad and depressing, and his mind too. But they are both really beautiful men with really beautiful beard. Most importantly, they think Thor’s beautiful too. Thor closes his eyes, rubbing his hair on his skin and feels loved, more and more. The image of his face that he could see in the mirror with that beautiful beard appears, and he must say he’s one hot ass sexy man with a face and a beard like that.

During the run of his hand on his face, he suddenly has it over his mouth, maybe on purpose as he feels himself panting for the self-orgasm coming close. He places his hand covering his own mouth, making the sound distorted, but it seems to make him more aroused. Why, does this mean Thor’s a little bit of masochist? Maybe… because he’s fascinated by the sound coming out of his mouth under his breath. He uses more force and gags himself, making the noise coming through his thick hand sound like a moan. He moans, as if he’s singing to himself. It feels great, and even better when he occasionally feels like could not breathe. From just a simple purpose to keep the volume low so that no one would find out, to a discovery that he likes being gagged and the moan excites him. His moan almost sounds like crying, as he’s coming closer to that satisfaction he’s been looking for.

But suddenly he stops, gasping for air and looking at his enormous genital. He decides to play a little fun, softly uses his thunder and lightning power to electrocute his dick with the tips of his fingers. They zap, and his body jerks up real fast, and he lets out a word “Ah”. It’s a little painful in the beginning but when it fades away, it leaves odd pleasure. Thor likes it, he tightens the grip and zaps himself with a little more of electricity than the first time. The shock is not very comfortable, making him grits his teeth, but then it quickly turns into absolute amusement. He laughs a wicked laugh as his eyes are still closed due to the shock and as he’s still feeling the pleasured sensation.

He then quickly throws his eye to a side, at his armor. He takes his red cape, with red being the color of erotica, wraps one tip around his cock, and stuffs the other into his mouth. He bites the fabric vigorously and bends his back down close to his thighs, a sign of impatiently desiring for the satisfaction of touching himself. His right hand still manages to cover his mouth as his left hand’s still doing its job. The image of the men, Tony and Steve, and himself, appears in his mind, every line of those beautiful muscles appears so vividly that it brings even more arousal. And he moans, he groans, the sound is like a euphoria. He cries, he pants, his breath is like a storm of mundane rapture. And he keeps rubbing his cock, up and down, up and down in increasing speed. He beats his cock, faster and faster, harder and harder, desiring more for the pain of his electric grip through his cape. And his brain keeps releasing the satisfying hormones along with the moving of his hand. His cock feels hurt from the friction, but it does stop climbing for the climax. It’s wild, it’s urgent, it’s magnificent, it’s crazy… It’s tearing him, hurting him, destroying his sanity, and dismembering his body connection as if everything is now divinely focused on that sexual body part. And it’s getting there, closer and closer, creeping to that climax, faster… closer… almost there… just a little bit more… And “Ahhhh”, he cums.

It shoots so hard, with a force from a cock of a god, it shoots so hard, so high and so far. It almost covers his own body. Thor has stopped biting his cape and opened his mouth gasping for air as he unleashed earlier, so some of his own juice flies onto his beautiful face and into his throat, too. He licks his lips with joy, as he’s still trying to catch his breath. It feels strange, but deeply pleasuring. The self-orgasm is incredible, as if it almost feels like no one in this whole wide universe can please him but himself. He lays back, bringing his left hand which just finished its jerking off mission to his face and licks a few spots with no thought of being a freak. Maybe it’s normal. His semen tastes salty, but good, his godly juice should be an elixir to a mortal, but he’s fine with enjoying that himself.

Thor shoots his look onto the ceiling, thinking about what he just did. It’s absolutely amazing and divine. It sure helps him relieved from all the negative and depressing emotions earlier. That masturbation has really reached into those very deepest and darkest corners of his mind, clearing anything toxic and only leaving the deeply beautiful connection with his body again. But if the Avengers still want to keep up with their mission bringing the disappeared half of the population back, Thor thinks he needs to find a better coping mechanism from beating himself up rather than beating his own cock.

THE END.

**Author's Note:**

> It was just an idea of a quick jerking off, but I felt a little bit weird so I put threesome shipping I have always loved but never had a chance to write about into this fiction. That's why it contains Steve Rogers/Tony Stark/Thor at lowkey appearance.
> 
> Thank you for reading ;)


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